Monday, July 20, 2009

Keeping the spark

If you are married, it is important to find something that you and your husband enjoy doing TOGETHER. When DH & I were newlyweds, I became great friends with a woman named Lucy. Lucy was just a few years older than me and had 2 children. She had a great relationship with her husband that I so admired. Her husband LOVED playing polo. Lucy didn't know a thing about polo when they married, so she ordered books and magazines on the sport. She read them until she was an avid Polo fan. She went to all of B's games and watched him and cheered. This became an experience that they shared together. It was a bond that no one else shared with B other than Lucy. She was a smart woman who knew her husband and marriage were worth the investment of her time and energy. I learned a lot from Lucy!

During this same time in our marriage, we met J & G. They were our age and had been married just a year more than us. Though distance separates us, we have remained friends. I just wish we were able to see them more than once every few years! J & G share a love of fly fishing. She is the woman!! They have taken vacations alone together to go fly fishing. The Lord knew I would not have been a good match for a man who loves the outdoors to the extreme. I consider camping a bunk with a bathroom in a cabin at camp without air conditioning. But J loves her man, and now adores her 3 sons, and she is quite the fly fisherwoman!! In fact, J & G recently returned from another great fly fishing trip. They share this love of the outdoors, and it binds them so that they face daily life and trials TOGETHER.

Another friend and her husband love to fix up houses. They have moved so many times I have lost count!! Every few years, they take on a new home project, and most of the time it involves an entirely different home. She decorates every home so beautifully and he can fix almost anything. My brothers and their wives also share this same love. They laugh over memories of projects they worked on TOGETHER.

Marriage is a gift from the Lord. It is our job to protect it through prayer, dedication to the Lord, and time spent together. If you don't have a shared interest with your spouse, find one. DH & I love to do everything together. When he's not working, we spend time together and as a family. Sometimes we play cards or watch a movie or go out to eat. Sometimes we embark on a family adventure in this new area. We work on the house together and we play together. I believe that all of these activities weave us closer to one another, thus protecting our marriage and showing our children that our relationship with each other comes before our relationship with them (our children). This does not mean we do not love our children, but we are called to love God first, then our spouse, and then our children. I can't wait to hear what you and your spouse enjoy doing together! (besides that! :))


The B Family said...

My favorite activities with my husband are morning coffee (we set aside about 30 min every morning before our girls wake up to drink coffee together and just talk about anything and everything) and our weekly date nights (we thankfully live close to family so almost always have a willing grandparent on hand)--we go to movies, go out to eat, go to events, and sometimes just go back home ;-)

Domestic Diva said...

Great post! My hubbie totally married me - because I deep sea fished, golfed and skied! I think that it so important that you love the same things. Though he is not a huge fan of shopping...he does take part with us. I think love and respect ..should go hand and hand. Thanks for joining my new blog!!
Happy Monday!!

Personalized Sketches and Sentiments said...

This is very true :o) we were very involved with our 3 kids activities... now that they are all away for college, we find ourselves enjoying "quiet "time...

...but it will be fun to take some trips...even if it's just to discover some local spots :o)

Thanks for sharing!

Kim said...

Amen! What a precious post! We work at taking a "date night" every couple of weeks. The time alone to have an uninterrupted conversation and adult dinner that consist of food other than pizza or chicken nuggets is a real treat and allows us to reconnect on a regular basis. Even if most of our dinner conversation is about the kids! :o)
Blessings from Hong Kong,