Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Infertility

DH & I married young, and we were ready to have children a few years later. We tried and tried, and nothing happened. It was so difficult to understand!! DH & I had waited until we were married. There was no reason to believe I couldn't become pregnant. But I didn't. Weeks became months. Months became years. I was still NOT pregnant. I believe that the Lord ordained it to be this way. He taught me so much in the years that we tried! The main thing He taught me is COMPASSION. Unfortunately, I can be quite judgmental. I look at you all pretty in your fancy clothes, driving your fancy car, taking care of your fancy children, and I think your life is footloose and fancy-free. What do YOU know about pain? Well, the Lord taught me. He taught me that I have no idea what is going on behind those "fancy doors". I have no idea what heartache those closest to me might be going through. Infertility is something people keep quiet about at first. Some always remain tight-lipped.


DH & I were filled with a need to share. We NEEDED the body of Christ to pray for us. We NEEDED friends to understand our struggle. If we had been fighting a disease or had lost a loved one, we would ask for everyone's prayers, so we decided to do the same with our struggle with infertility. I am so glad that we did!! We were amazed to learn of so many others who were also struggling. Our precious pastor at the time and his wife, had also been struggling for SEVEN YEARS. One day they miraculously were expecting a sweet baby. We rejoiced with them!

Our journey took us through some medical treatments. I had exploratory surgery and I tried clomid after that. During my surgery, the doctor discovered that transportation issues were my problem due to ruptured appendix when I was SEVEN. Who know that my life was altered in such a huge way at such a young age? We grieved. We cried. We asked God, "Why?" We asked Him over and over again. We asked for friends and family to pray for us, and they did.

Finally, we were led to IVF (in vitro fertlization). We did not approach this decision without prayer and discernment. We read the Bible and searched Scriptures, and sought godly wisdom from other believers. In the end, this is where the Lord led us. I know without a doubt that I could be the mother of triplets without IVF. If the Lord wanted us to have triplets, He could make it happen any way He wanted. And He did. He chose for us to go down a difficult path so that we would lean on HIM ALONE. He chose this path for us so that we could SHARE with others, just like I am doing now. He chose this path so that we could CLAIM His FAITHFULNESS. He chose this path to soften my heart and make it more compassionate!! I can't wait to tell you more about what we learned!

3 comments:

HoodMama said...

Beautiful post.
I have many friends who have gone through IVF and it is a path of faith and trial. Thank you for sharing!

Jessica Ryan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jessica Ryan said...

Sorry... too many typos in that last post! I wanted to tell you that your post was touching, poignant and beautifully written.