Saturday, May 16, 2009

Jon & Kate plus 8 minus 1


First of all, I am going to speak in generalizations. Please do not take offense to what I am saying or think that I think I am perfect. I am so far from perfect, it's not even funny!!! Women like to analyze, so during our car ride today, I analyzed this poor family to death. These are my thoughts, randomly organized, and you may completely disagree, which is your right!! In this little post, I am not saying women shouldn't work or that husbands shouldn't stay home with the children. Every family must decide what is right for their personal family. Some of my best friends homeschool, and some have round the clock nannies and don't work. I am somewhere in the middle, but that doesn't mean either of them are wrong! I am just sad to see this couple struggle, especially for all the world to see. So let's get to it....

Jon & Kate plus 8 have been in the news lately because of Jon's supposed infidelity. No matter what, Jon, the father of 2 sets of multiples, should not have been out at clubs at 2am with another woman. As a fellow parent of multiples, I questioned what happened to this couple. So, I bought a People Magazine today. And we all know you can trust everything you read in People, right? (ha ha) Nonetheless, it included an interview with Kate and you hear part of her side.

I am no psychologist, but the breakdown of their marriage seems pretty clear to me. First of all, there is no mention of faith. Personally I believe your marriage should be based on a common belief in Jesus as your Lord and Savior. DH & I try to love the Lord more than we love each other, and He helps us through each day and allows us to love one another as we should. We certainly have our share of struggles and are not perfect. Secondly, millions of viewers have seen Kate belittle Jon on national TV. If she will berate him for not using a coupon in front of a tv audience, what happens behind closed doors? Kate lacks respect for Jon. Wives, we must ENCOURAGE and BUILD up our husbands. It is sinful to belittle them, talk badly about them behind their backs, and to put them down. The Bible says, "Wives, respect your husbands." Kate has little respect for Jon.

Jon is a Mr. Mom. His role in the family is to take care of the children while Kate travels and does speaking engagements and book signings. Personally, I think this can confuse things when roles are completely reversed. I am not saying men shouldn't stay home with their children. Every family is different. However, men were made to hunt and gather. Women are natural nurturers. Yes, there are many wonderful fathers. I am married to one of the very best. However, D will be the first to tell you that it is not a natural fit for him to spend day after day alone with the children. Yes, he can do it. Of course he loves them. Men just are not made to be the SOLE nurturer of the family. If they were, they would have breasts that produce milk and hips for holding babies! I am NOT saying that Kate can't have a career and that she should not do her book signings and speaking engagements. That is not my decision to make. I have many friends who balance work and motherhood so well. . In the article, she calls herself the breadwinner and continually says it is her job to make money to provide for the family. There are many examples of families where the woman makes more money than the man and it is not a struggle. However, in THIS family, it seems to be a struggle. Kate doesn't respect Jon, so therefore, Jon does nothing to earn her respect. He doesn't show love to Kate, so she does nothing to entice him to love her. It's a terrible cycle.

Jon wants to escape so he goes out at night. Who was keeping the children at 2am while Kate was away on one of her book signings? And guess what? A younger woman was there waiting to show Jon respect, build him up, and make him feel wanted and needed again. Voila! A possible affair begins.

I hope that Jon & Kate will get some professional help to restore their marriage. Perhaps it's time for the cameras to move out so that they can heal. It is not normal to have your whole life documented in front of a tv audience. Sadly, the very thing that brought them fame and fortune in the first place is now driving them apart!! What are your thoughts?

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

You hit the nail on the head. Leave the spotlight, Kate, heal your marriage. Stop hurting your husband and your family. Your need to get your life right with the Lord. Fame and money are now your God. Look where you are NOW. How very sad.

EntertainingMom said...

coming back to post my thoughts in
a minute... but I am bestowing an award... come and get it!!!

pink green & southern said...

The whole thing is sooo sad and my heart breaks for the children.

Lauren said...

I found your blog via Kappa Prep. I totally agree. I go to church at Watermark in Dallas, TX and the Sermon for Mother's Day last week was exactly what you just said about the role of Men and Women with lots of scripture to back it up. Very Powerful http://www.watermarkradio.com "Extraordinary Opportunities for Non-Ordinary Women"

EntertainingMom said...

It's so, so, terribly sad. I think at first I thought their on-camera bickering was cute... it seemed, at the time, small stuff... much like Daddy and I bicker -- in jest. And then the bickering started to get mean. Nit-picky, really.

I feel so sorry for all parties... I feel sorry for Jon who must have been so miserable at home that he felt driven to seek something from someone else that he has not gotten at home. Not that I, by any means, stand by his less than stellar decision, but I do believe that it takes two to tango. There are two people to fault the dismantling of the marriage.

I think that Kate seems to have gotten power hungry. This too is sad.

There seems to be a great deal of disrespect in the Gosselin family. You were accurate in all your thoughts. However, I (in this case) cannot put myself in their shoes as I do not have 8 children -- 6 of them multiples. I only have 3, and the demands on me and my family are not nearly the same as theirs. And for that I am thankful.

I truly believe that we are not dealt more than we can handle -- It's all part of the grand learning process. Whatever happens to them, and to each one of us, is paritally in our hands, and partially up to a greater plan...

Melissa said...

I use to love this show. Since I have gotten married and we don't have cable, I don't watch it anymore. I have heard of the possible affairs (his and hers) via the internet. It makes me incredibly sad to see a family in the spotlight, who have once proclaimed to be Christian, fail while everyone is watching. So many people have high hopes for what appears to be a happy family. You are right about many things, including Kate belittling Jon. It is sad...but you can almost see it coming. Kate has changed over time, to care more about her appearance. There is nothing wrong with caring about yourself, until motives are involved. I can see you wanted to write about this and do it carefully, I appreciate that :D

Melissa :D

Imjustagirl said...

I have never seen a reality show that did not destroy a marriage or family. It is very sad. It seems as though fame and money have become more important than their family.

Imjustagirl said...

So funny I was wondering where in Florida you had recently moved to its such a small world! I have lived here (tampa area) almost my entire life and absolutely love it! Look forward to following along on your adventures:)

Kappa Prep said...

I used to be a big fan of the show before it went big and became super popular. However, as the show became bigger and bigger Kate became ruder and ruder and I slowly have lost interest. I totally agree with every point you have made. My father is a wonderful father, but like D he is the first to say he needs to get out and get to work! He would have gone stir crazy being at home raising me, the super out of control, wild child!!!

The Hayden Family said...

Bingo. You got it. You put your thoughts (and mine) into words. I have watched and read all of this hoopla for days with my mouth open. Your opinion hit the nail on the head for all aspects...husband, wife and children. I just hope that it works out for them in the best way possible. And your blog is like a warm blanket...it is so comforting. Thank you for that!

Black Labs and Lilly said...

Hi! I am a new follower and couldn't agree more! I used to enjoy the show, but now it is just a little too much to bear with the way the adults treat one another.

Deelsu said...

I am a new follower as well and agree.
Get rid of the cameras and Kate needs to be put in her place. She runs over him and he lets her do it.
As Dr. Phil always says -- "you teach people how to treat you."

Domestic Diva said...

Amen...
I thought the same thoughts!! I love your blog. I wanted to follow..do you have followers? I also wanted to send you an invite to my blog!
Have a fabulous long weekend!
xxx me
mermotherofidenticalmermaids@gmail.com